Literally Leah

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If my boyfriend dressed me for a week…. May 19, 2011

Filed under: Fail,Men — The Under-Analyst @ 12:03 pm
Tags: , ,

So today is a busy day at work, as usual.   But mid facebook chat I noticed that I had a new email in my inbox!  How exciting.  The suspense was killing me… Was it one of my daily newsletters on how to tone my thighs and butt?  Maybe an update from Amazon on things I should buy but never will? Or possibly one of the twenty e-mails back and forth with my mother? 

Maybe, just maybe, it was something super important like my daily horoscope!   

I quickly brb’d my friend on fb and clicked to my other tab.  Oh, what a pleasant surprise, it was an email from my boyfriend. 

Subject line:  “i think we should try this”

Fear crept over me… I quickly did an over-the-shoulder glance around to make sure no one would see what could potentially get me fired.

To my relief it was a link to a yahoo article.

I clicked.  What I discovered was a woman who allowed her boyfriend to pick out her outfits for a whole week.  It was entertaining and in his defense he actually did a pretty good job! 

***So I thought about it and wondered what my experience would be like if I tried this (as my boyfriend suggested).***

Day 1-  Apparently my boyfriend  has forgotten I work at a middle school and has picked out a small black dress with high heels and a push up bra.  
Day 2-  This skirt is WAY too short for work,  thank god I sit behind a desk most of the day.  The tank-top really makes it over the top skanky but at least he gave me a blazer to look “professional.”
Day 3- This is lingerie!  NOT CLOTHES.  No dear, the scarf doesn’t make it trendy.
Day 4-  I have been fired.  Thank you for the  sweatpants and  oversized t-shirt so I can cry on the couch all day.  
Day 5- My highschool cheerleading uniform?!   Please dress me more appropriately so I can leave the house to run errands and look for a new job.  PLEASE.
Day 6- NO, I will not wear the slutty Halloween pumpkin outfit to dinner with your parents.  NO.  I don’t care if the place we’re going to is informal! Besides I really can’t walk in those heels, no seriously, I can’t.
Day 7– My swimsuit?  Really?!  The boots do NOT tone it down.  What the hell is wrong with you? This is not Farmer’s Market appropriate. Oh you think a belt would do the trick?  I can’t even look at you right now…
Day 8–  My boyfriend and I have broken up…

2 Responses to “If my boyfriend dressed me for a week….”

  1. pootsie Says:

    well if they had their way we would walk in stiletto’s 24/7 paired with those Daisy Duke cut off jean shorts up the butt and throw in a half t-shirt with your boobs peeking out of the bottom- hey! that is a poster too, no surprise there!!

  2. nanny Says:

    HA! Forgive him; he’s from LA.

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